Cemetery Detective.

So remember that game I play where I like to form sentences that no one has probably ever said before?

Well, I like to think of actions that way as well. For example. I wonder how many people have been walking in a cemetery at night while dressed as Sherlock Holmes...

I guess it's really not that far-fetched. I'll have to step up my game next time.

The Why Cycle.

One of the darling little boys I babysit for once a week is at some stage of the "why?" phase. That could not be more perfect timing for me, having a blog (this one, to be precise) focusing mainly on questions such as who, what, where, when, how, and WHY!

He really gets me thinking about things. A lot of times when he asks "why", I don't quite have an answer! That little bugger is going to grow up to be a philosopher.

For example, today, he asked my why it was raining. I had to think a little bit while I recalled the water cycle. I told him it was because the clouds were too full of water. He asked why. I said it was because water from the land evaporated and went into the clouds. He asked why ("But why Awex, WHY?" to use his exact words). I said it was because the water gets too hot from the sun, and...uh...rises...because...

How DOES water evaporate?! Molecules can float around and ignore gravity and do crazy things. They can float right up into the sky and.....

Then I started to think, what am I doing? He isn't asking HOW. He's asking WHY. I hoped he wouldn't press the issue, because then we'd have to get into the question of God and the meaning of life.

That is some deep stuff for a toddler.

Alternate Universes Exist.

What is Déjà vu?

I mean, I know what it is. The phenomenon where you feel as if you've experienced a particular moment in time before.

I've taken many showers in my life (not as many as I should, perhaps...I blame morning classes), but never when I push aside the curtain do I proclaim, "My GOD! I've DONE THIS BEFORE! What's happening to me?!"

Déjà vu is so specific, the details of the scene you are experiencing so minute, and the events seemingly insignificant.

What's really bizarre, is that I actually experienced Déjà vu while writing this entry. And no, I'm not trying to be funny or cute. I actually did. I thought that perhaps I had written on this topic before, typing the exact same words...

What's going on here?!

Ladies and gentlemen, I am perplexed. 
So, my conclusion: Déjà vu is none other than proof that alternate universes exist. Good day. 

The Lives of Toys.

Do you ever wonder what your toys do while you're away or while you're sleeping? Okay. You probably don't. Most of you probably don't have the multitude of toys that I do, anyway.
Don't look at me like that! I can't let go of childhood, okay?!?

Anyway, I like to think they come alive. Actually, that idea frightens me half to death. But still.

Is there a "leader" toy, like Woody in Toy Story, that sort of acts as the president? I suppose my leader toy would be my stuffed dog, Fred. He's my favorite.
My villain toy would probably be my antique doll, Isabella, who is not unlike the most terrifying thing you've ever seen. I don't know why I keep her in my room.

But what exactly would the toys do? What could toys possibly do for fun? They don't have toys of their own, do they? Alas, the life of a toy must be a depressing one. Their sole purpose is only to please their owner. If that's not bad enough, they have to pretend to be lifeless in his or her presence.

Sounds a lot like a dictatorship. Yikes.

Word Play.

Isn't it weird how if you look at, say outloud, or write a word enough times, it starts to become very foreign? Like, think of the word "play". Play. Play. Playplayplayplayplay. What kind of a word is that, anyway??? It sounds so weird. Puhhh-laaaay.

How does one come up with a word? Do you just sit down and say:
"Okay. So there's no word for what happens when you make a moving picture of some sort begin. Oh, and also, there's no word for what children do to have fun. The word for both of those things is gonna be...plllllay. Yeah, play."

Genius!

Color Census.

How many colors are there?

"Millions" isn't a good enough answer! I want a specific number. Like, 513,897,111.6.

And I want a list. I want a list of all the colors with examples.

That way, I can make new ones. And name them after me.

Alexandra's Egg Blue!

...Eh, maybe not. That's a little weird. We'll stick with Robin's Egg.

August 2nd Predictions.

Happy August 2nd! It may seem like an insignificant date, but when you really think about it, it's possible that some important things have happened on any or all of the August 2nds of your life. I can't remember at all what I was doing on August 2nd a year ago...and that kinda scares me.

Isn't it weird how so many conversations, thoughts, and actions are lost to time? I don't like that feeling. I want to remember what I said to people and what they said to me. I want to remember how I felt and what I wore. I want to know what I had for breakfast on August 2nd 2008!!!

(I probably had Special K and coffee.)

Who would have guessed a year ago that I would be sitting here today? Drinking my white wine and blogging in my parents' house? I wouldn't have guessed I would be wearing a denim one-piece romper. I wonder what I'll be doing a year from now...I think I'll guess. It'll be fun.

I predict that on August 2nd 2010, I will have at least 1 and 1/2 new friends, I will have eaten Special K and coffee for breakfast, and I will be in production on some stupid short film of mine that I think is gonna turn out funny but is really gonna just be some sort of inside joke between me and myself.

. . . Now we play the waiting game.

A Unique Phrase.

I'm very unhappy with the length of my previous post. It's just a tad too long. I like to keep it short. I'll try harder this time.

On Today's Episode of A Bird's Stream, I'm going to attempt to craft a sentence that has never been spoken before. Often times when I'm having a conversation with someone and one of us says something strange, I like to wonder if anyone had ever said it before.

It makes you feel special if you're the only human to ever utter a particular phrase. And I like feeling special. So here it goes...

"If Napoleon were wrapped in a garbage bag and jumped out of a blimp then landed on the back of a massive eagle carrying a starfruit and the declaration of independence, would anyone hear?"

I dunno. I can say with confidence that no one else has ever said that before. What do you think?

Subconscious Freak Out.

Usually, I sleep pretty well. Rarely do I wake up in the middle of the night or find myself uncomfortable (unless I'm really cold --- I have very poor circulation). Well. Not last night.

I tossed and turned and woke up and fell back into light sleep a million times within the 5 hours allotted I had to slumber. It was quite horrible...and I woke up and couldn't figure out why that happened!

It could have been a number of things...too much wine, eating too much apple pie so close to bed, knowing I have to wake up early...well, all those things seemed to make sense to me.

Then I realized one very important detail: I was sleeping with the television off.

If you've read my previous post "Hot Haunting", you'll know that I have slept with the TV on in my room for about 8 years now. Religiously. For some reason, last night, I forgot to turn it on or something. And as a result...my body freaked out and couldn't sleep.

I had to rule out the wine, the apple pie, and the waking up early because those things happen on a regular basis (although sometimes the apple pie is substituted for cake. Or cookies. Or hot chocolate. Or s'mores.), and I always end up sleeping just fine.

I find it incredibly interesting how my body knew something was up, even though I wasn't consciously thinking about it.

Today's lesson: listen to your instincts, and pay attention to your subconscious. It will almost always lead you down the right path. Turns out your brain knows more than you think it does.

First Fire Story.

I was watching the mosquito tiki-torches burning a few moments ago, and got to thinking about stories around the fire.

I wonder what the earliest story ever told was. Like, you know, when cavemen were sitting around with other cavemen, they had to talk (or grunt) about something . . .

Here's an writer's rendering of the first story ever told:

"Once upon a time, yesterday, I threw a spear at a mastodon. It died, and I ate some of it. In fact, you probably ate some of it too. The end."

I want to turn this story into a movie. But I don't know who to contact about copyrights...

Invisible Qualities of the Universe.

Isn't it a little bit creepy that there are things in this universe human beings can't see?

Anything on the atomic level, ultra-violet and infrared light, bacteria...heck, the human eye can't even pick out every flap of a hummingbird's wings.

This leads me to believe that our universe has some strange qualities that we probably don't even know about. Okay, DUH. Obviously there are things about the universe that we don't know. But really, think about the possibilities...

There could be creepy shadow people from another dimension creeping around my bedroom as we speak. There could be trans-dimensional creatures everywhere. Protons might house billions of other universes. Aliens from the future could be running around in circles so fast, no one could even tell (why they are running around in circles, well...don't ask me, I'm not an alien from the future).

And, most haunting of all...if there are invisible people watching me at all times...I can't dance around naked in my bedroom to The Fine Young Cannibals anymore.

Dang.

Robot Love.

So, robots.

I think I'm the type of person who would actually fall in love with a robot. That's either a good thing or a bad thing: either I embrace differences and I don't discriminate, or, I'm completely psycho.

As long as the robot has a voice like Hal (2001: A Space Odyssey), I'd probably fall head over heels.

Which makes me wonder...how many people have actually fallen in love with machines? You know, like, toasters and such? There has to be someone. Hmm, educated guess? About...23. 23 people have legitimately fallen in love with machines.

Of course, machines are different than robots, in my opinion. When I think of robot, I think of something a little more intelligent. Well, now that I think about it, it's not that crazy to fall in love with a toaster.

Toast is, for lack of a better term, yummy.

Art Film Memories.

The human brain is an exceptionally amazing and strange creature.

Something as simple as chemical and electric signals provide us with memories: remembrances of sounds, scents, events, and images. Whether we like it or not, our past experiences live only in the mushy gray-matter housed within our skulls.

HOW IN WET ATLANTIS DOES THAT EVEN WORK?!?

I want to invent a machine that hooks up to your brain and projects your memories onto a big screen, so you can share them with other people. Of course, memories probably don't play like films. I'm certain there are a multitude of jump cuts, garbled audio, and unclear images and narrative...

Oh no. Are my memories ... ART FILMS?!

Peachy Dreams.

I have very strange, vivid dreams. Upon waking, I usually pick out a few of the items I believe could mean something, and look them up on dreammoods.com.

It's absolutely uncanny how what I dream usually reflects what's going on in my life. And I don't mean, like, you know, in literal terms. It's not like I eat a peach and then dream that I'm eating a peach later that night. Too obvious. It's more like, I eat a peach and dream about riding a white unicorn, which, apparently, according to some dream dictionary, means that I believe my peach was delicious and that I should seriously consider eating another peach in the future. (Dreaming about riding a white unicorn, in actuality, has nothing to do with peaches. As far as I know).

So are these dream symbols matching up with my life by coincidence? Or does my subconscious mind, only able to think freely when I am in the deepest stages of sleep, actually tell me things about my daily life and seek to lead me down the right path?

That's actually kind of creepy.

Moon Questions.

The moon. The pinnacle of all mysteries...the grandaddy of the unknown...the final frontier ---

Oh wait. We totally went to the moon.

With the recent moon landing anniversary, I feel it would be appropriate that this post revolves around (no pun intended?) that silvery ball we like to call the moon.

I was looking at the moon a few weeks ago. And it positively blew my mind that HUMANS have STEPPED on the moon.

If, by chance, any of the astronauts who have in fact walked around on the moon are reading this blog, I have some questions:

1.) What is moon dust like? Is it all shimmery and light? Or is it chalky and dirty?
2.) What does the sun look like from the moon's surface?
3.) Do you think the moon is haunted by the ghost of moons past?
4.) On a scale of 1-10, how cheese-like is the moon?
5.) In your opinion, which other moon could kick our moons ass?

I like to think scientifically.

Animals In The Ether.

How does Jumanji work?

I want to commission a couple of scientists --- physicists, mathematicians, and the like --- to give me some logical explanation as to how that game is possible.

Does the game have some sort of singularity in it? A black hole? A worm hole? It has to be some sort of hole, because it holds various large and dangerous animals as well as a scruffy Robin Williams.

Obviously, some of the magic lies within the dice. I wonder how I can get my hands on those...

Can you imagine? I roll snake eyes and a nice surprise pops out of nowhere. Well...of course, I'd have to tweak the game a bit so dangerous animals would be replaced by delicious cakes.

An Ammendment.

I'm adding to my alien bruise post.

Why would an alien pick me to abduct? Am I a prime specimen of human beauty and intelligence? Or...the opposite? Or maybe aliens just need friends. If I were an alien, I'd be very lonely out in space, too...

Maybe they don't want to study or befriend us at all. Maybe they want to eat us. Maybe they mark the chubby humans with butt bruises because they taste better than the lean ones...

Well, if that doesn't inspire me to count calories I don't know what will!

Alien Bruise.

So I have this big bruise on my butt...? Why does that always seem to happen to me?!

Mysterious bruises are the best. Usually I attribute them to alien abductions.

Well, wet Atlantis! An alien abducted my butt! Or, better yet...an alien implanted a tracking device in my butt. Or a mind-control device. Or a butt-control device...You know, I'm gonna stop here before I go too far with this one.

Space Decay.

If I shot a dead body into space, would it decay at all?

I'm inclined to say no...

So, what's the count of preserved human bodies floating around in space, I wonder? I suppose they would be in orbit of Earth, right? That's a weird thought. A handful of dead astronauts orbiting Earth just like the moon.

Dead people above, dead people below...

Hot Haunting.

Sweet Sassy Molasses, it is so incredibly HOT in Wisconsin right now.

Now, normally I wouldn't complain. I LOVE hot weather. But it's to the point where it has a strange side effect of restlessness. I just keep walking around aimlessly, from my room upstairs, to the living room downstairs, and back again . . . I find it to be quite unfortunate that air conditioning gives my mom a "headache".

I cannot tell you how uncomfortable I am. I am moving down to the basement to sleep. It's always at least 30 degrees colder down there than it is upstairs...

Anyway. I think my room is haunted. You see, ever since I saw The Ring, I have slept with the television on in my room (And yes, I realize that's like, 8 years). If the TV is already on, then there's no chance of it mysteriously switching on in the middle of the night, like in the movie.

So, moving on: I wake up sweating in the middle of the night, and glance at my TV. Static. Creepy. I try to change to a different channel. Still static. Yet another. More static. So I just turned it off. I think even though I hate the TV to be off, it's better than static...
Then, my computer starts saying "logged out of thehippiebird", like it does sometimes when I've signed off of my screen name. But I was already signed out, and it just kept repeating it in this creepy low computer voice at random intervals. I had to turn my computer off.
The next day, I was home alone. I got out of the shower, and kept hearing noises as if someone kept entering and leaving my room. This went on for a good 10 minutes, also at random intervals. I double checked to make sure I was indeed home alone...yep. I was the only one there.

So, obviously, I didn't flat out see a ghost or an alien or what have you. But there's something very strange going on in my room...
What is it that makes these sorts of things happen? Is my room really haunted? Or, is it a coincidental series of events that make it look like my room is haunted? Why was my television suddenly not working? Why was my computer flipping out, and did it have to talk while it was doing so? What was it that was producing those strange noises in my room? It's so strange how when things happen in a certain order and in a certain way, the brain interprets them accordingly.

I just hope the basement isn't haunted . . . I'm exhausted.

My Decision.

So, I have decided to keep a blog.

Why?

Honestly, I'm not really sure. But I think deep down inside I know it's good for my well-being. It's good to organize my thoughts, reflect on what I see and experience from day to day, and just get my fingers to flow with whatever happens to be on my brain. You see, if it's on the page...it's not on my brain! And I don't like things on my brain. My brain's weighed down enough as it is.

Well...I should clarify a bit more here. I don't wanna get personal. People spend too much time thinking about themselves. I'm guilty of it too, of course!

I want to make observations about the world and about people around me. I want to inspire myself to think and to grow. I think writing can do that.

There, blog justified!

~Alexandra